People, Connecting with People
I have not blogged about our travels around Berlin much as I’m starting to wain on documenting each moment of our trip. We have seen so much and I’ve enjoyed seeing everything and getting it down in my blog, but I’m starting to be more interested in how I’m feeling at this point of our travels, what I have learned from this extended time away from our home and how I’m interacting with people. I started this journey with the idea that I have spent the first 51 years of my life introducing people to my brain, my intellect, trying to show them how smart I am. A good friend, named Miguel, told me before I left that when he first met me he was introduced to my brain and he didn’t really start to like me until he met my heart, which wasn’t that far behind, but it wasn’t what I led with.
Today, I had my first opportunity to lead with my heart in an extremely meaningful way. I had a meeting with someone that I met through Rotary. This was the person that I emailed about attending their club meeting on Friday. He received my email and took some time to do some digging. He found my blog and was intrigued by what I was writing about and told me that we needed to meet. He is a very successful entrepreneur running a technology shop. The company has about 100 employees and he is your true, die hard entrepreneur who has a heart of gold. He loves his company and his people, but he is torn. He is someone that I have met hundreds of times before, but he is different, he is self aware and he is what I’ve been looking for this whole trip. He is the example of the person that I most want to support on their journey. Someone who has been successful based on our common definition of the word success, but knows that it is not his life’s work, it’s just how he has learned to make money. The issue now is how to not kill the cash machine and be able to pursue his life’s work. The most interesting part for me is his awareness and his desire to find out why he still feels empty with all he has accomplished.
To know that someone like this exists in Berlin further confirms my drive and determination for my return to San Diego in the next few weeks. I was able to truly be present in this meeting for the majority of the time. My new friend was also very present and when my brain started to show up he told me so. It was an amazing opportunity for me to dial into how I was showing up for someone else. I can really help this person with the challenges he is facing, but he can also help me with some of my blind spots. In the end it is all about connecting deeply with people, being there for them without attachment to the outcome, without attachment to what’s in it for me. This is something that has been programmed into our brains since we are so small that needs to shift. WIIFM? We need to let that story go ……
I am starting to understand what it means to lead with my heart, to introduce people to the whole me and not just my brain. I am a work in progress and will continue to learn every day about this significant distinction in my life. I need to be a complete person not just a walking head. It is this transformation that the past 5 months, without the distractions of day to day life, that has helped me see more clearly. It is this evolution that will not only allow me to be the person that I was meant to be, but the person that I need to be in order to have the impact I want to have on the world. It is time to leave my brain in my head and introduce the world to my heart. In the end our deepest connections come when we connect with other people’s hearts, not their heads.
To a life well lived!
Larry Kesslin 