Surrender
For most of my life I’ve had a plan, at least when I didn’t have a plan I had an idea of how I wanted things to go, a vision for my future. If I honestly look back at my history, each of those plans took a detour, some of them took a very big detour. I’m beginning to believe that having a plan and a direction is a good thing, but not being attached to that plan is even better. The thought is to lay out a path, a proposed direction. Once that path is set I believe we need to surrender to what the world is trying to tell us versus how we want the world to work. This seems to be the message that I’m feeling these day. It sounds pretty easy in words, but how do we surrender, how do we give up our concept of control and just let the world unfold?
I can’t say that I’ve figured any of this out yet. I’m trying very hard to stop functioning as a human doing and to become a human being. Maybe it’s a man thing, but I see so many of us who were “classically trained” to produce results focus so much time on the doing part and very little on the being part. We are pointed in the direction of “success” and we learn how to achieve that success through modeling those that have come before us. In my late 20’s and into my 30’s I did this all the time. I would look at people that I knew and people that I’d met, listened to on audio or seen on video and try to pick the attributes I liked best and emulate them. This was the foundation of Think and Grow Rich from Napoleon Hill. This proved extremely effective in helping me to achieve results. The only problem was that it didn’t always lead me to happiness.
The funny part is I always projected a happy exterior. I always showed people that I was happy and extremely positive, but it was all a mask hiding my fear and immense self judgement. Into my 40’s I continued to carve my own path, one with a positive exterior and a true sense of accomplishment. I listened to others but wanted to prove that I was worthy and I could create something awesome. I invested so much time and energy trying to prove myself to others and be liked. Each of these experiences have prepared me for the path that I’m on today, the one that I am learning to surrender to.
One of the big lessons I’ve learned is that I’m not the operator of a business, I’m a connector and business development resource and I’m surrendering my need and/or desire to be the CEO. When I have tried to do things out of my area of expertise the world has told me, in no uncertain terms, that this was not what I was supposed to be doing with my gifts. I wish I would have listened earlier, but that is one lesson that I’ve learned slowly. This all gets back to surrendering, to connecting the dots of our life and becoming the person we were born to be. I am trying very, very hard to listen to my heart and my soul, not listening to my head and my ego. The ego wants and needs the achievement. The heart and the soul need truth and needs to surrender to what is right for our being. I look forward to continuing on this journey and continuing to surrender to my higher self, to be of service to the world and use my gifts to leave this planet better than I found it. I’d love to hear your thoughts on the idea of surrender. How does it show up in your life?
To a life well lived!
Larry Kesslin 