Recently, a good friend of mine expressed that they need to relocate in order to find more fulfillment in life. I challenged them, especially because we both live in San Diego. How can anyone live in San Diego and still feel like something is missing? Is the change of location really what they need? I personally believe that maybe it’s the life we build that needs change, not our location. I don’t think a new location or home could be ideally structured for our happiness.
One of the most powerful lessons I have learned from traveling around the globe is that our challenges follow us. If we are unhappy in any aspect of our lives, that unhappiness will be with us wherever we go – it nothing to do with our circumstances. Is it possible that wherever we go, we follow ourselves? Our problems, concerns, worries, they’ll all be right behind us.
We cannot run away from our challenges. All we can do is love and appreciate who we are, stop criticizing ourselves for who we are not, and enjoy each day. I tell my kids that the sun will rise and set whether you have a good day or not. The days come and go, they don’t wait for us to enjoy the moment. The more we realize we are the architects of our lives, the more enriched our lives will be. We have the ability to create the life we want, with the people we love.
If we can do this, what else do we need?
Deep meaningful relationships.
For the first 5 years I lived in San Diego, my wife and I made friends from our kids friends’ parents. We meet some really nice people that way, but these were accidental, not intentional. Now I realize the kind of people I like to spend my time with. Whether accidental or not, these are others who share my passions, my purpose, and my values. We build each other up regardless of any circumstances we are in.
As my friend searches for the fulfillment they are looking for these are the things I hope they keep in mind. If they do decide to move their challenges will follow them, but I would hope they find the deep relationships they are searching for. The more intentional we are at attracting the right people into our lives, the more richness we will experience.
I look forward to finding more intentional friends and deepening the friendships we already have. As I found from my travels, deep human connections in life are what fulfills me most, and I believe my friend, and you will find the same.
To a life well lived!